I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of Jack Daniel’s. (Darynda Jones)

A small beer is better than a big thank you!

The best beer in the World is the open bottle in your hand!

What do a pregnant woman, frozen beer and burned pizza have in common? An idiot WHO forgot to take it out in time.

A lady came up to me one day and said ‘Sir! You are drunk’, to which I replied ‘ I am drunk today madam, and tomorrow I shall be sober but you will still be ugly’. (Winston S. Churchill)

Too much of anything is bad, but too much champagne is just right. (F. Scott Fitzgerald)

Fell in love with a beautiful blonde once. Drove me to drink. And I never had the decency to thank her. (W. C. Fields)

I’ve never been thrown out of a pub, but I’ve fallen into quite a few. (Benny Bellamacina)

If you can make it down to the pub, the pub will make it up to you. (Benny Bellamacina)

Beer is the answer… But I can’t remember the question…

I don’t have a drinking problem ‘cept when I can’t get a drink. (Tom Waits)

Beer doesn’t have a lot of vitamines – that’s why you need to drink a lot of it!

BEER – it always tricks you into thinking that you’re a good dancer.

Religion is a non-alcoholic man’s alcohol. Alcohol is a non-religious man’s religion. (Mokokoma Mokhonoana)

Did you know that 6-8 beers per day can reduce your risk of giving a shit?

Drinking just to get drunk is like having sex just to get pregnant. (Robert Hess)

Apparently beer contains female hormones. After you drink enough, you can neither drive nor shut the hell up!

I’ll drink responsibly when there’s a beer called “Responsibly”!

Write drunk… Edit sober! (Ernest Hemingway)

Many people die of thirst, but the Irish are born with one. (Spike Milligan)

Beer – drink all you want, they’ll make more!

Wine is not a magic serum og truth. It just silences that smart Little voice in your head which advises against saying some dumb shit. (David A. Fearnhead)

I Cook with wine, somtimes I even ad it to the food. (W. C. Fields)

All the best pubs are build on a hill, so you can slope in and roll out. (Benny Bellamacina)

Give me a woman who loves beer, and I will conquer the World. (Kaiser Wilhelm)

Glasses are for people that sip instead of drink. (Kari Starr)

Non alcoholic beer is like watching porn blindfolded.

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in Water there is bacteria… (Benjamin Franklin)

Beer is not the answer. Beer is the question, and the answer is YES!

The sacred pint alone can unbind the tongue. (James Joyce)

If I saved all the Money I spend on beer, I’d spend it on beer. (Earl Dibbles Jr.)

On Victory, you derserve a beer. On defeat you need it. (Napoleon)

Wine – a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy. (Benjamin Franklin)

Reality is an illusion created by a lack of alcohol…

My New Years resolution is to enjoy watching everyone fail at their New Year resolution… And drink a lot!

Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer. (W. C. Fields)

Never miss a party… Good for the nerves – like celery. (F. Scott Fitzgerald)

99% of all problems can be solved by Money. And for the other 1% there’s alcohol. (Quentin R. Bufogle)

Unlike beer, love doesn’t taste as good when it’s Cold.

Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy! (Warren Ellis)

Alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities may produce all the effect of drunkenness. (Oscar Wilde)

Good people drink good beer. (Hunter S. Thompson)

I will never, ever drink whiskey Again. From now on, it’s strictly sherry. (Libba Bray)