I don’t have a drinking problem ‘cept when I can’t get a drink. (Tom Waits)

I’ll drink responsibly when there’s a beer called “Responsibly”!

Beer is not the answer. Beer is the question, and the answer is YES!

Drinking just to get drunk is like having sex just to get pregnant. (Robert Hess)

Glasses are for people that sip instead of drink. (Kari Starr)

Write drunk… Edit sober! (Ernest Hemingway)

Many people die of thirst, but the Irish are born with one. (Spike Milligan)

Wine – a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy. (Benjamin Franklin)

Never miss a party… Good for the nerves – like celery. (F. Scott Fitzgerald)

If you can make it down to the pub, the pub will make it up to you. (Benny Bellamacina)

Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy! (Warren Ellis)

Non alcoholic beer is like watching porn blindfolded.

The sacred pint alone can unbind the tongue. (James Joyce)

Alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities may produce all the effect of drunkenness. (Oscar Wilde)

Wine is not a magic serum og truth. It just silences that smart Little voice in your head which advises against saying some dumb shit. (David A. Fearnhead)

I’ve never been thrown out of a pub, but I’ve fallen into quite a few. (Benny Bellamacina)

Give me a woman who loves beer, and I will conquer the World. (Kaiser Wilhelm)

My New Years resolution is to enjoy watching everyone fail at their New Year resolution… And drink a lot!

The best beer in the World is the open bottle in your hand!

Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer. (W. C. Fields)

I will never, ever drink whiskey Again. From now on, it’s strictly sherry. (Libba Bray)

I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of Jack Daniel’s. (Darynda Jones)

BEER – it always tricks you into thinking that you’re a good dancer.

Fell in love with a beautiful blonde once. Drove me to drink. And I never had the decency to thank her. (W. C. Fields)

I Cook with wine, somtimes I even ad it to the food. (W. C. Fields)

99% of all problems can be solved by Money. And for the other 1% there’s alcohol. (Quentin R. Bufogle)

A lady came up to me one day and said ‘Sir! You are drunk’, to which I replied ‘ I am drunk today madam, and tomorrow I shall be sober but you will still be ugly’. (Winston S. Churchill)

All the best pubs are build on a hill, so you can slope in and roll out. (Benny Bellamacina)

Reality is an illusion created by a lack of alcohol…

Unlike beer, love doesn’t taste as good when it’s Cold.

Did you know that 6-8 beers per day can reduce your risk of giving a shit?

Too much of anything is bad, but too much champagne is just right. (F. Scott Fitzgerald)

A small beer is better than a big thank you!

Beer is the answer… But I can’t remember the question…

Religion is a non-alcoholic man’s alcohol. Alcohol is a non-religious man’s religion. (Mokokoma Mokhonoana)

Good people drink good beer. (Hunter S. Thompson)

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in Water there is bacteria… (Benjamin Franklin)

What do a pregnant woman, frozen beer and burned pizza have in common? An idiot WHO forgot to take it out in time.

Beer – drink all you want, they’ll make more!

Apparently beer contains female hormones. After you drink enough, you can neither drive nor shut the hell up!

Beer doesn’t have a lot of vitamines – that’s why you need to drink a lot of it!

On Victory, you derserve a beer. On defeat you need it. (Napoleon)

If I saved all the Money I spend on beer, I’d spend it on beer. (Earl Dibbles Jr.)